The Key to Unschooling Success: Getting the Support You Need

I know most of you have heard the word unschooling by now. And probably a lot of misinterpretations out there too.

That’s one of the reasons I do this podcast. I want you to know that as weird and unconventional as unschooling may sound, it’s not really.

 It’s about taking a step away from the conformity and status quo of the school approach and SEEING the learning that exists in the world. It’s noticing that schools are not keeping up with the speed of this Information/Innovation Age we live in now. But more importantly - your little learner is not their priority. Their system is. Their choices are based on what serves the school system - not what serves the needs your rambunctious or bored, cooperative or defiant little kiddo. 

I do this podcast for the same reason I’ve written books and Unschooling Guides. It’s why I’ve created courses and run social media groups. I want you to see that other moms (and dads) like you are out there making this out-of-the-box choice for their kids.

I was just a mom from the suburbs. My husband was in the military, I worked part time as a nurse. I was in the PTA and played Bunco. I did water aerobics and edited cookbooks. My kids were in T-ball and Kindermusik classes.

All the regular stuff.

But I looked at those 3rd and 4th graders - that seemed SO big compared to my little 6 year old...and they looked like zombies. They were so bored. So worn out from sitting in classes. And I wanted something different for my child.

I thought, “Gosh if they’re like that at 8 and 9 years old, how will we EVER be able to do 12 years of this?”
So in our situation, the Air Force was about to move us from San Antonio to Alaska.

And I thought,
“What if keep him home with the girls? How hard CAN second grade be? And if I make a mess of it, we pay taxes, they have to take him back! Right?”

School Wasn't Working

But let’s back up just a little bit to explain what was happening to nudge me off the conveyor belt. Or at least to start to notice that I was not that crazy about how things were going. 

My little guy was bringing home his Red Folder every day since Kindergarten. Always filled with red and yellow dots - the goal was green or blue ones. Red Dots meant problem behavior:

• Talking too much.
• Finishing too quickly.
• Too many questions.
• Chatting with his neighbors.
• Not staying still in lines.
• You know... all the important things! 🙄

They told me in Kindergarten that he wouldn’t stay in his seat long enough to do the Gifted and Talented testing, so… maybe next year. And, no one thought,
"Oh maybe he might be bored."

Nope. Just rinse and repeat. 
He was pretty bored.

But my problem was partly because of the times. I only knew 2 other people who had homeschooled - and they were a little …weird.  And I was judgy. I had completely dismissed my own memories of school - because that was like death and taxes. Unavoidable. 



Gathering New Information

Then I met someone who’s kids were teenagers - and she homeschooled them. The teens made eye contact and held regular conversations.. They weren’t weird. I was at their house for a lunch thing, and I poked my head into their kitchen where they were doing the dishes - and they were pushing dishsoap bubbles into each others’ faces - like “normal” kids. Ok.

Maybe I was too quick to dismiss this opting out of school thing.

So I started picking her brain. 

And that’s when I really started to learn how this can work. She showed me catalogs of fun ways to do science and history. She introduced me to a couple of other moms who did this. They shared what they used for curriculum and described getting together with other families to go to places out in the community.

I hesitated on some of the things they shared, because I really didn’t want to DUPLICATE school at home. But I thought I could at least sparkle it up a little. They told me, “All kinds of people are starting to homeschool now!” in this very wary tone… and I thought, “I might be exactly the kind of person you’re worried about…” But my own school experiences had taught me how to smile and nod, smile and nod.

My goal was to gather as much information as I could and then we’d do these subjects however we wanted. And within the first year of homeschooling, sitting at park days and community outings, picking MORE people’s brains, I heard about this thing called unschooling. They were seeing learning in a whole different way. They brought me magazines like Home Education Magazine and Growing Without Schooling, and it started to make more sense to me.

It was what I wanted all along, even though I didn’t realize it when we first set out on this journey.

Support for YOU Now...



This is the reason I keep talking about my Creating Confidence membership group. Talking with other people who are also on this unschooling path helps you see what life could look like for your family too. I love being in there - on the private Whatsapp and Facebook channels for members, sharing stories and talking about what I’ve seen work and what I’ve seen not work. I love being accessible so you can do what I did - pick the brains of people who have done this!  And after 27 years - I’m really happy to be here to share what I’ve learned. What I would have given to talk every day with people who whose kids were grown and happy and didn’t duplicate all the school ideas that I wanted to get away from.  I’ve created what I would have liked - a space where you can ask questions and find solutions. Brainstorming bout unschooling and parenting from this more connected approach. It’s my favorite place to hang out. So if you’ve been thinking about it - you should come get some support - from me and from the community. We can always talk privately on the phone - and I have a lot people who do that. But there’s something about the hive mind! I love that so much!

So that’s really the message of this podcast - don’t be afraid to pick people’s brains. Surround yourself with people who can actually help you be successful. You really don’t have to do this all alone.

Yes, it takes a little courage. But you have a good reason to be brave - your kids need you to do this for them.

And, as strongly as you may feel about some things - educationally or parenting-wise - know that you’re in for a journey too! Moving around in this unschooling world will open your eyes to things you didn’t even realize where happening! It’s all part of the deschooling process - where we start is often a long ways from where we’re going to end up. That’s what I’ve seen over the years and you will too.  I’m super excited for you!