Why Playing Video Games Can Be GOOD For Kids!

Guest Blogger

Have your children experienced trauma?

Was bullying one of the reasons you've removed them from school?


Roya Dedeaux, LMFT, shares seven reasons why parents should consider encouraging (rather than discouraging!) their children from playing video games.



Play MORE Videogames?


Playing video games can be one of the ABSOLUTE BEST THINGS a kid can do after undergoing trauma, abuse, or even "just" experiencing a difficult time.


Here's why:

1. We deal with our issues even when we don't talk about them. Our brains are processing. We don't always need to do it out loud. Have you ever been troubled about something and gone to bed, then the next morning you wake up with a solution?

2. For kids, especially, having a sense of power when they have gone through abuse or trauma is really, really important. Video games and play are EXCELLENT ways for kids to get a sense of empowerment and mastery. They literally have the controls in their hands. I can't stress how important that is.

3. We can't talk about heavy topics all the time. Our brains need a break. Use video games as a distraction and see that as a good and necessary thing!


Unschooling Guide: Technology


The 25-page full-color magazine-style PDF will help you dive a little deeper in this concept of embracing technology.

Society resists everything that's new - and we've absorbed a lot of the messaging against technology. Learn more about what that means so you can hop off the mainstream anti-kid conveyor belt, and do what's best for your family.

This Guide will help you!


Get this Guide

4. Studies have shown that after trauma, video game playing is one of the best ways to minimize potential PTSD symptoms, particularly flashbacks and unwanted sudden recall. It does not diminish a person's ability to recall details when they want, but increased game play helps with unwanted memories. This has been a huge benefit in the field of trauma work!!!

5. Game play of all types can be a foundation for healthier relationships, especially if they don't have good attachment or have a reason for distrust. Accomplishing goals together, seeking out resources together... these are valuable potential tools for the adults, as well. I often play games in therapy sessions to build rapport. There's science about why it works - but anyone who's ever played a game with anyone else already knows this!

6.  Video game play provides tools for resilience - social, emotional, mental, and physical resilience. You gain optimism, seek out allies, use resources... Again, this skill is so important for all kids, but especially kids who have gone through trauma.

7. When you value their interests you are showing them you trust and respect them. When kids are abused, it shakes their foundation of the certainty of their identity. It's even more important for them to learn how to trust themselves. A relatively easy way to do this is to trust how they choose to spend their time.

I can't think of a better tool for kids who have been through abuse than playing a LOT of video games with the trustworthy adult in their life.

Roya Dedeaux, author, therapist and grown unschooler living in Southern California with her husband, kids, and assorted chickens and dogs.

Roya has a M.S. in Counseling and a B.A. in Recreation and Leisure Studies. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (#95302), with a private practice in Los Alamitos, CA, and does long-distance counseling for homeschoolers.

She believes strongly in the importance and power of play for all ages, and has spent the majority of her personal and professional life inspiring others to become more playful.
Find out more about her book, 
Protect Their Passions, ” and other ways to work with Roya at her website, www.royadedeaux.com.


By Sue Patterson 13 Apr, 2024
If you're looking into unschooling, it's not unusal to wonder, "How DO unschoolers learn school subjects?" or "How will they learn what they need to be successful adults if you don't go out a buy all the curriculum in all the typical subjects." The word, "successful," is going to mean different things to different people. Maybe it's about getting into college, or finding a good career. Maybe it's more about personal happiness - and the ability to fund that themselves. Last week, I hosted a free webinar for about a hundred people wondering this same thing. It's up at the Unschooling Mom2Mom YouTube channel now - please subscribe! We talked about the actual subjects that weave into a variety of everyday activities for kids. I have visuals and handouts - all the things to help you get more comfortable with this concept when you hop over to the description at the YouTube channel. (If you registered for the webinar, check you email inbox for the links.)
By Sue Patterson 02 Apr, 2024
Sue Patterson shares what's wrong with hanging onto a little curriculum - when you'd like to full benefit of unschooling!
By Sue Patterson 19 Mar, 2024
How do Unschooling Parents find each other? Sue Patterson shares 4 ways that work!
By Sue Patterson 09 Mar, 2024
Let's talk about "Screen Time." We need to shift our conversation with the kids about their love for technology and electronics.
How much is too much technology?
By Sue Patterson 04 Mar, 2024
How much IS too much - when it comes to gaming and surfing the web? Especially if you're going to unschool! Sue Patterson shares strategies for how to tackle the technology in your home!
By Sue Patterson 14 Feb, 2024
What's the big takeaway when an unschooling mom looks back? Lean into the Love. Originally written in 2012, and now updated for 2024, Sue Patterson share's what she wish she had known... way back when.
5 Signs it's time to Unschool
By Sue Patterson 08 Feb, 2024
5 Signs that it may be time for you to start unschooling! Whether you've been homeschooling and it's not working out as planned, or you're looking for alternatives to public schools, here are 5 Signs it may be time to start homeschooling from an unschooling perspective.
By Sue Patterson 23 Jan, 2024
Social media is in a flurry about the Pythagorean Theorem... why we learn it, how we learn it, what's the point? So I decided to ask my Robot Friend how DO we use the Pythagorean Theorem in real life. I think you'll be surprised!
By Sue Patterson 21 Jan, 2024
While no unschooling family would be considered "typical," a few characteristics are common for those who successfully unschool. Sue Patterson solves the mystery and shares what a few of these traits are. Perfect for those who are trying to figure out how to unschool or are looking for how to create a homeschooling routine.
Create a Reverse Bucket List - brainstorming on paper with Post-its
By Guest Blogger 04 Jan, 2024
Spend a little time with family creating your own "reverse bucket list" - identifying and celebrating accomplishments from this past year!
More Posts
Share by: