An Unschooling Shift to Gratitude

 Maybe this week, plan to listen to this one, and another on Wednesday and another on Friday. Or if you have 30 minutes, you can crank out all three. I’ll put this transcript at the blog, so you can refer back to it. Put the link in your calendar, schedule a time to immerse yourself... here’s why. 

When we’re opting for this unschooling route, there’s no conveyor belt moving us along. We have to do that for ourselves. And that’s not something most of us are really good at yet. We’ve grown up with other people telling us what to do, where to step, when to be there… so SOMETIMES, it turns into just going from putting out one fire to another. That squeaky wheel thing. Our days can sometimes feel like that. I get it - mine felt like that a lot of the time too.

But LEARNING how to be intentional with pieces of our day - that’s what I want to help you do. 

You’ll still have to put out fires, but if you carve out 15 minutes for this, you WILL see a difference. A difference in YOUR own attitude, your own reactions to the inevitable problems that will pop up - and if you show your kids how to do that, they’ll develop a skill that you didn’t learn as a kid.

So, where WOULD you fit it in?

You don’t have to have a fancy journal - even though that’s usually the most recommended thing.

You could just have something to remind you to THINK about something you’re grateful for. Something that went well. Maybe you grab a scrunchy and put it on your wrist.

Then when you look at it, you can look around - what’s good?

What’s happening right now that’s going well? 

The heat running? 

Food in the fridge? 

Wifi is still strong?

You found the phone charger? 

Challenge yourself to think of 3 things every time you look down at your scrunchy. 

Not only will this help you develop a gratitude practice, but you’re refocusing on the present moment. No regrets about the past decisions, no fear about the future. The here and now. 

You could even set alarms on your phone to pop up 3 times a day, with a “Whats Good Right Now?” message. 

My coaching group met this morning and we talked about even using a white board for Gratitude. Just random notes written graffiti style up there. Or maybe you could stick post-it notes on a bulletin board - or just on the wall. Another person in our group uses a big bay window and washable markers to make it interesting for the kids - and be right there reminding you. 

Maybe things like big fluffy clouds against that blue sky.

Or autumn leaf changes.

Or the golden sunlight in the evenings.

Maybe it’s gratitude for a pet or for warm cookies or hair detangler. (I know, random. Just remembering when my daughter was 7 and we had a terrible time with her hair!)

Another thing we talked about on the call was something I reminded myself when I was looking at those past podcasts about gratitude. There’s a video at the bottom of one of the pages where she talks about those nightly conversations of gratitude. I was thinking about my grandson, who often FORGETS the good things that happened during the day, so if I say, “What went right today?” I get a blank stare. Or “Not much.” For some kids, that’s a lot of pressure. And maybe they have a tendency to be a little more Eyore-ish.

So in that video, she talked about helping the kids create a habit. So throughout the day, when something goes right, you can say “Hey! Let’s remember this for tonight when we’re thinking of our Top 3 Things That Were Good Today." 

We can help them find those things, so they can go to bed with a little feeling of gratitude for their day.

Maybe all week, you’re going to think about gratitude in little recurring spots in your day. They talk about creating new habits that way: Pairing it with something you always do. So you think about gratitude while you have your coffee. Or while you’re in the shower. Maybe you put a post it note on the mirror that says: Shampoo/Gratitude as a reminder. Or when you’re waiting to pick someone up from somewhere. Use a washable marker and put Gratitude? In small letters on your rearview mirror. Or hang a post-it note off of there.

Grateful AS Unschoolers

And since this is Unschooling Mom2Mom, I want to give you some reasons you can be grateful AS an unschooler.

Grateful that...

• It’s legal to do this. Or if you’re in a country where it’s not legal, that you’ve found a way.
• You get to be with your kids and help them develop into who they were meant to be.
• They get to pursue their curiosities and see them as valuable.
• They they get to skip all the conditioning to be a People Pleaser, or passively waiting for information to be fed to them.
• They can learn to be resource finders and move deeper into it or skip around dabbling until something peaks their fancy.
• They can learn how THEY like to learn best and that sometimes we do things differently from other people. And it’s okay.

We are able to sleep when our body says we need it, adjust our day to our energy level, and not to requirements of some system.
 

Maybe we’re grateful that we found another way.

A way that could be truly individualized for the people in your family.

A way that didn’t duplicate school or school-at-home homeschooling.

A way where we could prioritize our relationship with our kids and help them learn to navigate the world. 

Yeah. Lots to be grateful for right?

Don’t stop with just listening to this one podcast.

Think about how you can remind yourself to be grateful - just a little every day.